Thursday, October 9, 2014

A Few Words From "The Supposedly Deranged" Chick

Greetings from Ellensburg, WA, home of  Central Washington University!

(go wildcats.)
 
Amidst my college adventures, I have had a sudden spark of inspiration to blog this week...and not necessarily in a good way.
 
I don't want to start off on a negative note, however, so let me first say that I am transitioning nicely to university life!
 
I decided this past May that I was ready to go to school after a year of graduating with my AA from Bellevue College. I was done working in jobs that weren't leaving me fulfilled in ways that I want to be. So many due dates had passed for college applications, and I knew I was late into the game. I was talking to a good friend of mine about wanting to go back to school, but most likely would have to wait another year. Another year of a possible job that wouldn't really be exactly what I want to be doing. He told me that Central Washington University was taking applications. One visit and one week later,  I was accepted and decided to attend for this fall. This school had the right programs, the right kinds of people, and, big bonus, the affordable tuition that I was looking for. All around, a great life step for Maddie!
 
I am about to end my 3rd week here, and, for the most part, things have been amazing. I have met some wonderful people, I have joined an a cappella group, and I am enjoying my classes.
 
Well...I was enjoying one of them. Until this past Tuesday...
 
 
DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUNNNNNN...
 
 
Ok, I'm being a little over dramatic.
 
 But, ladies and gentlemen, I left class on Tuesday PISSED.
 
 
I am a person who can hear pretty controversial things and not want to get into huge, heated debates around them. Things will spark my interest and I will want to discuss it, but few things get me really fired up.
 
I'll explain what happened.
 
To put it simply...
 
The world is so much more ignorant about Autism than I thought.
 
 
Before class had really begun, we were all sitting around, waiting for the last few people to get into class. The professor and some students were talking about really smart old guys (I am assuming, honestly, I was pretty focused on level 347 of Candy Crush Saga, but I was still some-what listening). Albert Einstein came up, and a student had asked if Albert Einstein had Asperger's. My teacher scoffed at him, and I looked up and commented on the fact that there have been many theories on certain historical figures having Asperger's.
 
 
My teacher then says...
 
wait for it...
 
 
"They probably did. They were pretty deranged."
 
 
I'm sorry...
 
what?
 
 
Did that really just come OUT OF YOUR MOUTH?!
 
 
The majority of the class burst out laughing. They then proceeded to make jokes about "those crazy Asperger people" and how "Asperger's is just an excuse to be an asshole". Never mind that just the week before, in an assignment about showing vulnerable life moments on stage, I talked about my Autism diagnosis as a kid. I'm just sitting there, with some eyes of my peers on me, who could probably guess how I was feeling in that moment.
 
Look, people, I understand that sometimes jokes get a little carried away, and that we don't mean hate or harm when we make certain jokes at groups of people...
 
but seriously...
 
ouch.
 
I have heard many people talking about how our society has become way to politically correct. How people now spend so much time and effort being sensitive to others that no topic is safe to laugh at anymore. Comedy has become narrowed down, and people don't like it. I get it.  However, what was said wasn't funny. Nothing about being called "deranged" is funny.
 
 
I don't have a freaking puzzle piece tattoo on my forearm because I enjoy being labeled "deranged".
 
I have it because it is a badge of honor, and I'm damn proud of my experiences. 
 
 
As you can probably guess by now, I was pretty upset. Myself and many people close to me were the target of ignorant humor, and I'm here to say today that IT IS NOT OK. Of all the things to laugh about in this world, a group of people, with many born natural talents and gifts, do not deserve to be the subject of your laughter. In that moment when things were being said, I felt like yelling, I felt like crying, I felt like telling them all to STFU. But none of those things would have helped. Their ignorance would not have been addressed positively if I had lashed out in anger. In that moment, I was too angry to really find appropriate phrasing to address what they were saying. I wish I had, but I didn't. So here I am, blogging to all of you reading this. Why? Because it needs to be talked about. We need to stop letting things slide when words are said at the expense of someone else's being. Whether it was an indirect attack or not, what happened was still a form of BULLYING.
 
 
Being mindful of the things you say doesn't just apply to Autism.
 
It applies to race, gender, sexuality, mental illness, rape, weight, abuse, and on and on and on...
 
 
My overall point, is that you never know what people around you may have gone through. You might not be aware of all of the insecurities, hurt, past and present issues that someone may be going through. What you may find funny is probably not if it at the expense of someone else. What we go through behind closed doors is our own business, and we shouldn't have to wear giant signs on our foreheads exposing the "skeletons" in our closets. Especially when it comes to Autism, when so many people in our society are now affected by it, you don't know who in the room around you might have some kind of experience with it. I am pretty confident that I wasn't the only person in that classroom with some kind of relation to Autism in some way. I was not only insulted for me, but insulted for my peers who are Autistic, for all of the kids I have met in my job experiences who are on the spectrum, and for historical figures who have shared their intelligence and passions with the world. It shouldn't take away from their impact on the world because they may or may not have had Autism.
 
I can't be angry at people for being ignorant, but I can be angry when things are said that can potentially bring hurt feelings to someone in the room, whether they "meant to" or not. It's ok to not know a lot about a subject. To quote a certain little rabbit, "If you don't have something nice to say...", you know the drill. Have good judgment. Think before you speak, and speak when you're well being is being compromised by the jokes of someone who may not know better.
 
 
Call me overly sensitive, call me short fused, but I'm not going to stay quiet about this, and neither should you.
 
 
Guys...just don't be a dick.
 
Xoxo.
 
Maddie :) <3